MOM – Mother of Me? :P

Dear woman who’s abandoned her daughter,

COME BACK ALREADY!!! What, you taking it out on me for stretching around a lil when I was in your tummy? What was I supposed to do with the brand new legs that suddenly grew out of nowhere? You be happy I didn’t chew your insides away. Your anguish during those days surpassed nothing else, you say? You’ve forgotten how it was in your own mommy’s tummy? Same boring place. Blood and mush all around. Food streaming in, euckie stuff streaming out. No tv, No music. A finger sprouting out here, a toe springing there. No wonder the baby’s eyes don’t open up inside. Poor thing would pass out.

Don’t you remember my big, beady eyes? My soft, cute little hands and feet and lilting smile? What do you want me to do? Throw baby powder all over myself so you’ll snuggle up to me again? Grrr.

Okay don’t snuggle up or mollycoddle or anything. Just come back and cook some nice food for me. That’ll do. And you know, turn the house back into a home from the living quarters I turned it into. And, don’t get mad at me – your carpet has warmly hosted a swarm of guests – soft drinks, soups, coffee and tea, juices and yaadi ya. I didn’t know what to do with them – so they’re probably still mingling around in there.

You super-mom/super-woman, you. Don’t you want to fly back here and use your powers to set everything right?

Your starved, sickly and dying child.

Hello, I had to boast.

*DASHES IN*

LOOK WHAT HAPPENED!!

Dance Fiesta 2011, Champions, Open Category

JOY IS ME!!!

*DASHES OUT*

Economist, Reuters and IHT would do you more good right now.

Honey-puffs, Sweethearts and Muffins,

It’s the last month of the semester, when we’re swept over by the whirlwind of projects, exams and assignments. So no writing for a while now, unless the page gets stained by random literary cathartic upheavals.

Love,
Me.

Blubber and Blabber.

Dear You,

You realize it now…don’t you?

That wasn’t your fault. You’re not a runaway maniac that needs to be tamed.

It was the heavy chocolate, cream and coffee frolicking with your head. Down with Java Chip. Maybe it’s some covert operation by Starbucks to get all the girls lapping up sugar and stoking conversational libido with inebriated spirits.

It was the big round slab of cold, gooey poached chocolate topped with thick swirls of liquor cream at ‘Awfully Chocolate’ cavorting with your cognition.

So, next time these friends force chocolate down your throat, learn to move your head a bit to the left, and a bit to the right..nice and firm…’shaking’, they call it. Nod violently all you want in the depths of your heart but not the slightest indication of an affirmation should escape your dry, parched lips in need of melting chocolaty goodness that just makes you swoon.

All that chocolate is just going to get warm and comfy and hang out of your skin, sweetheart. And a divorce is as hard as is easy the matrimony. Be a teetotaler hereon, yes? We need to get you back to your previous psychological dwellings that barred all blubber.

And hopefully, we won’t have you jabbering away till dawn either.

Amen.

Warningly yours,
Your future Yokozuna body

One of those where I can’t be bothered with the title.

Someone puts up ‘praying for Japan’, as a status message on Facebook.
Around a dozen people go ‘Like’ it.
Another two dozen go put up the same status.
A revolution is born.

And perhaps they all feel like they’ve done their bit, non? Maybe that’s how it works in this day and age. Earth-shattering, nerve wrecking news about the world banal enough to be muddled along with the useless daily dosage of ‘what’s on your mind?’. That’s their ode, their eulogy to the bereaved.

The Viral marketing of emotions.

Even awareness campaigns have leaped onto the bandwagon. Remember the breast cancer awareness campaign? Putting up statuses about ‘where you liked it’. Using pseudo sexual connotations as a trigger to maneuver titillating curiosity to manifest awareness. So everyone found out it was breast cancer awareness month. And I guess all the ladies sprinted to the docs and got themselves checked, or whatever it was – the numbers dropped. The statuses made it to the news and the cause proudly stood its ground.

Thing is, as long as there’s a clear purpose to things, I’m good. So, really, if your virtual prayers all combine spiritually and shoot up into the air and shower down on people in the form of food, medication and shelter then go all out and wail about Japan, Libya, Tunisia and Egypt. I’ll stab my keyboard with good wishes too.

If not, then be grateful for being safe and sound, and go give your mommy a big hug instead of haranguing on Facebook.

Pfft.

Crossing the line to touch those curves.

China is going to grow. India is going to explode and die. America is stupid. Greece is lazy. Ireland, Spain and Britain are just eating off from their debt – ‘Fool’s paradise’ he says. And Singapore is a Utopian god’s own land.

I sit enamoured yet slightly deflated by his moribund tone. He tells us we are too young to know what’s good for us, he says ‘you young people want more democracy…look what democracy did to the west’, “you young people don’t know what you want’. In the context of Singapore of course…or at least that’s what I’d like to think.

He loathes politicians such as Sarah Palin and the likes, and is amorously admiring of politicians like LKY, whom he was once an advisor to. When asked a question, he smiles wistfully, shakes his head and enlightens the distraught student while the rest gaze in silence; some deaf to his baritone, others lapping up every single word. I oscillate between both. 😀

I do tend to question him (in the safe abode of my own little head) but realize I’m a tad hesitant to reach a conclusion different from his highness. Maybe I should major in his little field, so that I can sieve these things out for myself instead of sitting like a disciple under his spell.

Economics, you are one sexy subject. I’d like to levitate you around my head, and crack your greasy nut.